| wow lots to say |
[03 Apr 2008|11:31pm] |
since the last time we spoke, in october, i broke up with john, got back with joe, gotten broken up with, then back together again with john. its like humpty dumpty :]
nicole and i went to mexico for spring break and had an amazing time
john makes me really happy
i love my best friend natalie edwards... who is currently in chicago for a visit... but i miss her a lot
i got in a car wreck on monday.
i love my subs.
i eat tooo much peanut butter and honey, popcorn [only from that popcorn place] and donuts.
oh and i'm going to prom with will dunham!
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| long time no see |
[18 Oct 2007|12:51pm] |
I'm home "sick" actually just in a state of depression
Tabi (my birthmother) died 4 years ago today of alcohol poisining.
My Grandma is in the hospital.
My mom is flying to Lubbock later today to see her, and so is my aunt from Mexico City.
I feel like I should go and be there with them.
I am dating a boy named John and I am as happy as I could be!
I hope you are all doing well
!
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| life... |
[21 Aug 2007|01:13am] |
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is great!
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| things have started to get better!! |
[04 Apr 2007|05:36pm] |
i broke up with joe!
i am really happy with everything right now!!
everything may not be perfect, but when is it ever going to be perfect?....NEVER
oh well
im happy
and i am happy and i am happy!!! SO HAPPY!
live love and learn!
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| it has come to the very lowest it can get... it can only get better, right?! |
[19 Mar 2007|06:12pm] |
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mood |
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 confused |
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for those of you who don't know...
joe decided that it would be necisary for us to "go on a break...but not break up" but everyone knows...a BREAK is a BREAK UP... am i incorrect?
oh and he did this via TEXT MESSAGE...
oh AND he did not choose to reply back to my confusion and just completely left me hanging...
but i think i am single...right?
can i date other people?fool around? i don't know...these questions have been bothering me...but of course he would NEVER respond to that so i should be silly to ask.
well...i THINK i am single!...as sad as that is...but w/e!
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| damn do i love calvin! |
[28 Feb 2007|08:40pm] |
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"damn girl you must got a large bank account, wit all dem babys you be a shittin on"
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| happiness is golden |
[22 Jan 2007|09:25pm] |
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Joe and i have been together for 8 months on thursday!
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| baby you have no idea |
[11 Jan 2007|06:45pm] |
these days have been crazy.
my parents are looking at private schools for me.
i will probably be leaving mccallum soon.
i hate everyone...just about.
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| i think i just cried a river |
[06 Jan 2007|02:18am] |
i don't know why.
i am in an amazing relationship.
i just read a really happy story.
i saw someone tonight i haven't seen in forever.
i ate some really delicious ramen.
but one problem ... i need ideas on what i should get Joe for his birthday... ASAP!
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| maybe i should |
[10 Oct 2006|08:59pm] |
just keep quiet like everyone esle is.
not say a word.
not answer my phone.
and not respond to texts.
tomorrow is my birthday and i just don't even want it to happen.
i just want it to pass as if nothing is really going on jsut like everyother day in my life.
i don't want to see the people i have been looking forward to seeing i don't want anything. just to go back to sleep and avoid everything. stop expecting people to take care of me or to love me.
i need to realize that nothing is real.
you aren't really there for me, i just wish so much that you were/are but no.
nothing is really there and will actally stay there.
NOTHING.
not friends not family no nothing.
i wish you could realize that too sometimes.
someday everything will be erased.
there is nothing we can do except live in the moment and take everything for granted.
why don't you step up?
will you ever?
or will you just always just kind of be "there"
... why do i think you will change and just magically be there for me ONE day... haha
i kid myself.
i try, i call i text i plan
but you close yourself off.
why??
!!!
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| these are the days i truely miss; |
[07 Oct 2006|12:18am] |
playing with Natalie like we were little kids;
OrchDorksAHS;
endless days together;
Elegy for Iris
being a stalker;
BACAK!;
Hannah;
Basically my brother...the one on top...haha;
GOT CRABS?;
Home;
T-R-A-S-H-E-D;
Real mom;
True mom;
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| It's times like these... |
[03 Oct 2006|09:12pm] |
...that i wished that you would be there for me holding my hand not judging me on my mood or how i am acting at the point in time, you just know i don't feel good, mentally and physically. times like these i need you as a best friend, not just a partner in crime. i am uncomfortable and scared. wanting to be held and loved. and being told "everything will be ok" and that you love me and think i am incredibly beautiful no matter what.
i miss that.
i miss you.
i want that.
i want you.
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[25 Sep 2006|09:17pm] |
i have cried everyday for the past two weeks
but today it was tears of happieness and love
joe and i got back together!!!!kjghsdkg IM SO HAPPY
=re-written=
Nicole and myself are going to move to CA
after we go to NYC and play @ carnagie hall in the summer of '08;
and start our life together. [not as lesbian lovers]
im going to find a film school in CA and she's going
to find a film school and we are going to have
the coziest apartment together. i love her a lot.
i couldn't see myself living with anyone else.
mmm
so happy...
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| ... |
[10 Sep 2006|08:47pm] |
i can't remember getting drunk but i can clearly remember the hang over saturday morning.
jesus it was bad.
this has just been such a coz weekend.
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[07 Sep 2006|08:28pm] |
i couldn't remember when i last posted or if i even posted.
probably b/c of my short term memory loss.
its lame as fuck.
i don't think i will be getting another car for 10 more weeks.
my dad is on the phone w/ cingular canceling our cell phones.
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| Nerve Damage. |
[31 Aug 2006|07:29pm] |
So I spent my day trying to stay awake on many muscle relaxers.
I went to the chiropractor and then to the Doctors.
Both doctors found that I have severe nevre damage that affects both my hands.
I have to have massage therapy, a chiropractor and acupuncture, and not last but not least Spine and nerve therapy; all of which i have to have done at least 2 to 3 times a week.
new car up date;;;; possible 2000 volvo s80. very nice condition no wrecks and low millage on it.
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| I am so happy i survived and im alive!!! |
[29 Aug 2006|06:39pm] |
my car spun 3x times across 4 lanes, i hit the gaurd rail then on coming trafic hit me head on b/c my car was spun the opposite direction. when the lady hit me it sent her 2 lanes over. and all of mopac was closed offf. both cars r totalled.
http://www.kvue.com/news/top/stories/082906kvuerain-gv.48e33734.html
you will see my crashed /totalled volvo 1 min. 45 secounds into it
the only think that kept me alive was having a volvo thank god.
my arm and back are pretty badly hurt.
pictures later...
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| bleh |
[23 Aug 2006|08:47pm] |
i realized i am a complete failure in friendships/relationships/ and best friendships.
i also realized today that i am terrified of people ditching me and dumping me to the side and running over me... so i do it to them before they can have a chance of hurting me.
i also realized i can't rely on myself at all. i am not mature enough to do ANYTHING on my own... i JAVE to have people right next to me making sure i don't fall... its horrible.
i can't trust myself or rely on myself to keep promises much less to others but even to myself
i feel horrible.
i have not only let down people i TRUELY love, but i let down myself. and i want to apologize to those who i have dragged in my past threw my shit...
i= is not capitalized through any of this bulletin b/c i am so disgusted w/ myself right now i don't "deserve
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